Never give up, but get even!!

I was asked a few years ago to give a talk in church on "The Joys of Motherhood". Here is the talk I gave:

Every Mothers Day, I would sit my children down and tell them that the only thing I wanted for Mothers Day was happy, loving children who obeyed and didn't squabble and fight with one another. I would watch them with teary eyes as they sang; "Mother dear, I love you so. I will try all day through, to please my Heavenly Father. I'm so glad He gave me you". By the time church was over and we had made the trek home, I realized that my Mothers day wish was unrealistic. I would hear the familiar sounds from the back of the van. "Mom, he's looking at me!!" "Am not!!" "Are too!!!" "Mom, he took my whatever!!" "Did not!!" "Did too!!" By the time we arrived home, I had had it. I would send them to their rooms and tell them not to come out until they were ready to leave for college. Then I would go into my own room and shut the door. I deserved some peace and quiet on Mothers Day!! I decided then and there, that even though I wasn't a perfect mother and I knew that my children would never be perfect, I was going to get even!!! So, this is what I did:
1. I stayed home. For twenty-five years they were under my surveillance 24/7.
2. I elected myself president of their fan club and showed up at every recital, concert, awards program, and playing field.
3. I made them take music lessons and I even made them sing together.
4. I accompanied them on their choir trips to Boston, Montreal, Williamsburg and Orlando.
5. I bribed their friends with home made treats and a place to hang out.
6. I made them go to church every Sunday and early morning seminary, Young Women and scouts.
7. I made them accountable for their choices.
8. At the age of twelve, I made them do their own laundry.
9. I made them teach me what they had learned at school each day.
10. I started "Moms Savings & Loan". They had to work to earn money.
(No free handouts at our house!!)
11. I never allowed the Relief Society to bring in meals. I taught them that compassionate service begins at home. If I was in the hospital, they had to serve one another.
12. They had a strict curfew!! If the Holy Ghost goes to bed a midnight, then so should they!!
13. I made them dress modestly, especially at the dinner table.
14. They were required to keep the Sabbath day holy.
15. They were required to kneel every day in family prayer.
16. They had to participate every Monday night in Family Home Evening.
Yes, sir, I got even!! and what did they do in return?
1. They made me pin Eagle Scout badges on both sons.
2. I had to look on as all three daughters received their Young Women in Excellence awards.
3. I had to take three of them to the Missionary Training Center.
4. I watched as they earned college degrees.
5. I had to go to the temple with everyone one of them.
6. I've had to accept wonderful daughters and sons-in-law into the family.
7. I've had to rock 17 grandbabies.

Yes, Mothers Day is a wonderful day now. My advice to all you young mothers out there is "Never give up, but get even!!"